I recently had a dream.
I was walking up Charles Street in downtown Baltimore and I saw early-90s Robert Redford walking slightly ahead of me. Rather boldly, I trotted up to talk with him. I told him I admired his work. I carefully praised some of his more obscure films, like The Hot Rock and Brubaker, to appear more than just a casual fan.
We continued to chat, I can't remember about what, as we walked. Finally, Redford turned and asked what I did for a living. I told him I was a screenwriter. He said, "So,what do you have for me?"
Wow. I couldn't believe it. Robert Redford was asking me to pitch him. Now, the dream must have been set in the present day, because I immediately thought of my most recently completed scripts Chapel Street and Final Table. I kind of panicked, because there wasn't a suitable role for him in those scripts. I finally remembered by old reliable calling card The Long Drive. He'd be perfect for the role of the former President.
However, before I could tell him about the script, Redford grabbed his upper left arm and winced. Then he said his chest hurt.
"You're having a heart attack," I shouted.
I took out my phone to call 9-1-1. However, it wasn't my iPhone. It was an old-fashioned flip-phone.
While I dialed 9-1-1, Redford got down on his knees in pain. The operator answered. I said, "Robert Redford is having a heart attack. I need an ambulance."
"Where are you?" she asked.
I looked around. I wasn't on Charles Street anymore. I didn't know where I was.
"Tell me where you are?" she said again.
Redford was now moaning in pain. The area was crowded with people, but I still didn't recognize any landmarks.
"Wait a minute, I'll find out where I am on G-P-S," I told the operator.
I took down my phone and looked at it. It was still just a flip phone. There was no way to get the G-P-S coordinates from it.
Then I realized that, because I had a stupid flip phone, Robert Redford was going to die.
Before he read my script!
That's what really horrified me: That Robert Redford would die before he read my script.
I woke up with a very vivid memory of this dream. I was shocked. I couldn't believe how utterly shallow and self-centered I was in it.
Oh, well. I guess once a screenwriter, always a screenwriter.
Sorry, Mr. Redford.
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| Damned Flip Phone! |
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 2, The House
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 3, This Is Us
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 4, Arrival
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 5, Methodology
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 6, Clara's Tale, Pt. 1
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 7, Clara's Tale, Pt. 2
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 8, My Tale, Pt. 1
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 9, My Tale, Pt. 2
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 10, My Tale, Pt. 3
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 11, Natalia's Tale, Pt. 1
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 12, Natalia's Tale, Pt. 2
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 13, John's Tale, Pt. 1
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 14, John's Tale, Pt. 2
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 15, Come Inside!
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 16, Marion's Tale, Pt. 1
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 17, Marion's Tale, Pt. 2
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 18, Jeanne's Tale, Pt. 1
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 19, Jeanne's Tale, Pt. 2
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 20, Lisa's Tale
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 21, Recap, Pt. 1
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 22, Recap, Pt. 2
The Haunting of 21 St. Helens Avenue, Part 23, Recap, Pt. 3
Them flip phones will get Yu ever time .
ReplyDeleteThey're killers!
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